This past Valentine’s day I decided to get Jacob some German chocolate truffles and a study that would not only cultivate his soul and deepen his relationship with Christ but it would serve as a tool to strengthen our understanding of each other, our special bond and our quickly approaching marriage.
To start off a blog about what love looks like and feels like, I must say that I’m thankful for Jacob and the kind of man he is and chooses to be. He was not only excited about doing the study with me but at times, he became more disciplined to get into the book which helped inspire me to keep trucking through the chapters and learning more about how God designed marriage to be.
This is praiseworthy to me because Jacob is praiseworthy to me. There are a lot of men in the world who would have just laughed at a book like this but because of both his excitment and serious understanding of its purpose, I was able to flourish and my heart grew more soft. That in itself helps me know, yet again, that he is the man I have been waiting for.
Because we live such busy lives and have a long engagement, Jacob and I have been slowly digging into our 31 Day Pursuit Challenge books. The books in of themselves were written to compliment each other with their corrsponding days but its a seperate read for both the husband and the wife.
After finally finishing the challenge, I can say with both hands down that I’m thankful for this time. I’m learning how to love Jacob in ways he best feels loved, it’s pushing me out of the mindset to treat my relationship with him as something commonplace and its uprooting places in my heart where my sense of “self” is so strong, stubborn and destructive. This book was both painful in dealing with my own truths and yet healing for the special relationship that’s in the bond of marriage.
One of my favorite ideas learned through this study and others is that when a man feels respect- the woman feels loved. It is a beautiful cycle and when it’s in action both feel life, love and contentment. Because when a woman doesn’t feel loved, she tends to not respect her man. And when a man doesn’t feel respected, he tends to close off love/affection for her. And vice versa, the two have to work together. However, those “rules” sound, its easy to overlook them but wow are they important when it comes to how a man and woman were specially created.
So I want to challenge you to pickup a copy of both the husband and the wife 31 Day Pursuit books! Yes, the books were desiged for those already married of which Jacob and I aren’t fully yet. But I did find that it was possible to tweak parts of the book that are strictly for marriage. So I do recommend this book to those who are engaged and are about to be married. I, however, would not recommend this book to you if you are either single or dating. But will say that the wait is worth it, press into God and look forward to my future blog post on the joys/struggles of singleness (I have a whole lot to say on that one).
Wishing you all well!